I WANT TO

IGNORE WHAT PEOPLE DONE AND WHAT PEOPLE THINKS ABOUT ME I JUST WANT TO LIVE HAPPY AND HEALTHY

I'm Sorry I Didn't Finish The Breakfast Mommy

This morning i had a dream about you
We gone somewhere over a place that looks unfamiliar for me
We are a backpackers i have the big one and you have that leather one we hung it on our shoulder
We drop by to a Coffee Shop we sat there on the corner.

I realize something strange, everyone is talking in different foreign language. I put my bag, and about to order some drink in the middle i met an old couple said "Looks like states eh?" i left you on the corner of this coffee shop

As i ordered a cup of coffee and waited till my order came out. The doors wide open"Bang!" it slammed i turn my back and i saw a big guy short hair white sleeveless shirt blue jeans and a Ray Ban covers his eyes. He came in. A poke on my shoulder made me turn my head "Vanilla Frappuccino young boy" i get the coffee by the plate, get some sugar, and go back to the corner where i left you.

I found that you gone from that corner. It is not even funny. I hold a bag i think it's yours and i gone further to where you sat earlier, there's another backpack and they all empty. I looked outside there's nothing instead of roofless car passed, sunny weather, and a palm tress on the corner of the street. Nothing i can hear instead of mix spoken foreign language by the visitor, none of them look at me or even give me something useful, information? It was sunny and a bank across this coffee shop and i heard a screeching tire.

i opened my eyes and see my room, the heart is thumping hard. I need a glass of water

Deprivity

"Can... Can i hold your hand?
A little boy asks. words shaking shudder of unknown twirl in the spine
"Sure..
The girl hand is held by him
Road lights
Stores about to close

Rich.. Poor
High.. Average
Spoiled.. Mature
Likeliness.. No support

A song sung by him, and being a prayer
"She is my sunshine
"She makes me happy when the skies are gray
"You don't know dear how much i love her
"Please, don't ever take my sunshine away

Go Down, Take A Licking, Be Bested... Lose. Thumbs Down For You :)

University
that words haunting. Like a ghost. Look at these people who have a place that they routinely gone and see their friends there whether they know them or not they always saw them so they doesn't feel that they were lonely
Sometimes i feel like i wanted to study hard, but in fact I'm being steady. In one place, creased by a lack of concentration. You can't concentrate on more than two things at the same time so you have to put attention fully in one thing in one time. I know i know, let these words flow is easier than doing it

Sometimes i feel I'm a loser, a lot of time i feel I'm a big liar
No thing i can do to make those feelings gone
I'm a waste I'm a fleeting place to stay
Why am i have to be going in this way
No one will help me except myself
My own self

...
God, this is the last year, hear my voice. I want medical program Universitas Indonesia

Most Of My Time Spent Just For Making a Fool. Got a Problem With That?

I got a call on late night 

The phone rang

It is a friend of mine which is i just knew him from late 3 months

he pissed. Pissed because i don't take everything he said seriously

then this came out

A: "Why did you never get serious dude! Come on be serious!"

B: "No, i don't want to"

A: "So? Why?"

B: "If we're too serious we'll disappointed"

Silence

A: "Yeah it's right though.."

Who can stand hearing a story for guy fornicating, which is detailed? No one raise their hand

If there's no biological urge between a couple they might be not attracted to each other.

Curse sex before marriage!

It ruin everything, for example i know a boy who have a long distance relationship with his girlfriend they had been dating not for a long time, and then one evening the boy got a phone call 

*rang rang "Hello can we talk?" "Who is this?" "Oh this is Gerry" "I'm in the middle of a gig, how about call me later?" "Okay!" But then Gerry texted "The truth is i can't stand it being like this, i've been fulfilled her need" "what?" "I mean the last time i was in bed with her is 2 days ago" "Whoa whoa whoa what do you mean?" Then Gerry told it everything he hope that the boy can understand but broke down like uno stacks he was. What's the reason they've been asking about it while they still "a little more touch me". All the thing the boy said is "Where did you put my feelings to you while you doing that?"

Misused mistake

They Put A Plastic Bag Beside Me And Said "It's Uncommon To See You Alone Sir" And I Smiled

I explained about an ancient way to measure body to her that night when the TV streamed National Geographic Channel. Like a picture vitruvian man, the first drawing of human anatomy.

I said to her that she can measure her own height with just spreading her arms beside her elbow. She pays an attention that's good, and then i continued "It can measured from the edge of your longest finger which is your right middle finger to left mid..." but before i finished my words she done the same stance as i am then came closer, and wrap her hand on my body.

She asked that is it okay, she just wanted to done that but i said some words convinced her that it's not even a problem so i wrap my arms around her neck

On a moment of time all surrounding things made an elaborate musical composition in a form of rhythm. They coalesce as a song for a slow dance. The clock ticking matches the sound as we step making a circular movement changing place

I know how big she is how close our height is, she still small that time. Small enough to be in my arms. Feels nice maybe secure is the right word for that time. I can't get bored with it.

The greatest feeling of all time it is the feeling when i felt her cheek touching my cheek. It's just unbeatable. Words can't describe

Until she wanted a hollow patched for a moment, she cried, put her head upon my shoulder and then i held her back and rubbed back of her head i said "It's okay you're save now, you're with me"

Ear Plugged Doll Head, Comb The Fringeeee!

It almost 4 months passed since i lost the only one i have. It isn't nice not seeing them around. It reminds me to a point where me and him wanted to make a present. I remember he shows me how to deal with strings and needles, he teaches me and and after it finished he laughed
Remembering someone just making me down into status quo, steady situation. Where i regretting many things that never happen. I wish he's still with me i'll take him everywhere, i'll ask him to ride me anywhere, and i'll introduce him to the one i care. But He's gone
I just still can't forget these things. I'm bored being like this
And no one ever feel the same as him.

I could buy an Tickle Me Elmo doll, or Transformers voice changer mask to make me forget these things. But at certain point i wanted to show the cool stuffs to him. I wanted he saw the best stuff in the world for current time, but the fact he is safe now. I'm tired of mourning

My brother said "It's fine for being young and still have a lot of friends surrounds while you getting older they all gone, they living their live, they being individualist" and i've been starting to feel that. Maybe i just have to get a university so i can have many friends and got young friends so i can keep up with them my childish act. Well i after all i got one more friend, but he had changed because a girl and i think it's enough to make a proof that a girl changing a way people behave.